My sister put this together, so all the references to relatives are the same for me:
These are my great-great grandfather (from my mother's Yankee side of the family), Asa Gates White, born 1817, and his third wife, a spinster schoolteacher named Martha Bush Keyes, born 1826. The Keyes and White families were friends. Like Asa, Martha was born in Morgan County, Ohio, and later moved to Wabaunsee, Kansas.
Wabaunsee was founded by Congregationalist abolitionists from the East just after the Kansas-Nebraska Act was passed in 1854. Its schools, where Martha taught, are noteworthy for having always been integrated, 100 years before Brown vs. Board of Education. Later, Asa and Martha moved to San Diego, while Asa's children stayed in Kansas.
My grandfather, Harlow Ferguson, was Asa Gates White's grandson. In 1891, when Harlow was six years old, he and his older sister Bernice were orphaned in Kansas, and their grandfather Asa died a month later in San Diego. Asa's widow Martha was left responsible for the orphans' care, but whether because she barely knew them or because she lived at such a daunting distance, she did not send for them to California. Instead, Harlow was sent to live with a schoolteacher in Wabaunsee, presumably a family friend of Martha. In later years he hired out to a number of different families as a farmhand. He never again saw his sister Bernice or left Kansas. Bernice, though a protestant, was sent to a Catholic orphanage to live; we have no further news of her.
The White family traces its origins back to Elder John White, a Puritan and one of the founders of Cambridge, Mass. Asa Gates White served the Union Army in Company K, 6th Iowa Cavalry, from 1862-1865.
My father's family, on the other hand, the Kilpatricks, were completely Southern, having emigrated to Virginia in the 18th century from Ulster, and then spread through the South along with the cotton culture. All able adult Kilpatrick males (too many to list, but including two great-grandfathers) fought for the Confederacy. Only when both my parents ended up in graduate school in 1944 at Berkeley did the Northern family join with the Southern. Eighty years before, their ancestors had been fighting each other, sometimes in the same battle, opposite sides.