A lot of readers may not know that I am married, but I have a beautiful wife and a fine, strong son who is now a bit more than a year old. For your reading pleasure, a scene of domestic tranquility:
I decided to take a nap...
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*BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM*
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"Baby boy, quit beating on the bedroom door.� I think your father is trying to take a nap.� We don't want to disturb him."
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[five minutes pass]
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"OK, I need to go talk to your father for a moment--if he's still awake."
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[door opens]
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"Dear, are you still awake?"
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[SCREEEEEEEECH! of JOY from Baby Boy at seeing his father.]
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"Ah, good.� I was hoping you would be.� I need to talk to you about this grocery list.� We're just heading out the door, and I need to know if you want anything."
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[five minutes later]
"OK, good, I'll get that stuff.� Now, bye.� Oh, wait.� I haven't had a shower or changed clothes or anything!� Watch the baby for me, will you?"
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[twenty minutes pass]
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"OK, now we're really ready to go!� Come on, baby boy!� Daddy will finally get some peace and quiet!"
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[sound of family trundling down stairs]
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"But you'll need a binky, won't you?� Well, I'll find one.� Don't follow me upstairs!"
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[ten seconds pass]
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"What did I just say?"
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[more sounds of wrestling with baby]
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"Now we're really going!� Daddy can get his nap!� GOODBYE DADDY!"
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[sound of door slamming shut]
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[ten seconds pass]
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[DOORBELL!� DOORBELL!]
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"Um, hi dear!� I don't know where I put my keys.� Could you find them and bring them down?"
��
*growl*
*snarl*
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