Timely How-To from the Babylon Bee

13 Ways To Tell If Your Priest Is An Undercover FBI Agent

Feb 10, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

So there you are, trying to worship peacefully, and then out of nowhere a priest tackles you to the ground and arrests you for radical traditionalism because you spoke in Latin. Now you're in Guantanamo Bay being waterboarded about where you were on January 6.

How'd you get here? You didn't keep your eyes open for FBI priests!

Here's how to discern that your parish is under federal control:

1. He's wearing aviators and an earpiece with his vestments

2. The new confessional booth looks a lot like a white van with FBI agents in it

Click over for the rest

In related news: FBI Investigating Plot Inside The Catholic Church To Worship Something Other Than The State

This Is Fine

 

Trump says Mar-a-Lago home in Florida 'under siege' by FBI agents

This is a provocation. They are trying to get a reaction that allows a further crackdown.

And today's award for uncanny prescience goes to Joy Pullman, who this morning published the following:

The FBI And DOJ Criminalizing Opposition To The Regime Is How The Republic Ends

UPDATES: 8/9/22

Justice Department should have subpoenaed documents, not raided Trump’s home

by Alan Dershowitz

... it is now up to the Justice Department and the FBI to justify their actions to the American public. They must explain why a different standard appears to have been applied to Democrats such as Clinton and Berger than to Republicans such as Trump and many of his associates.

Search Warrant Or Not, Americans Have No Reason To Believe The FBI Raid On Trump’s Florida Home Was Justified

FBI's Mar-a-Lago Raid Presents a Time for Choosing: The Regime, or America | Opinion

For an All-Politics View

Why the FBI raid on Mar-a-Lago is a gift for Donald Trump's 2024 election bid

For an Alt-Reality View

The Mar-a-Lago Raid Proves the U.S. Isn’t a Banana Republic

Finally, Donald Trump’s misdeeds are catching up with him

Your Friday Night Movie: The FBI Releases "The Nevernight Connection"

From American Military News, I learned that the FBI and the National Counterintelligence and Security Center have released a short movie based on a real-life case to raise awareness of how China recruits Americans with security clearances. 

I'll pop the popcorn.