Always hatin on the cauliflower

What's a woke folk to do?  If we plant cauliflower in our community gardens, we're guilty of colonialism.  If we plant yucca and plaintains, we're culturally appropriating.  If we plant no community gardens, we're murdering Gaia and propping up Big Agriculture and capitalism, assuming we don't live in a produce desert.  What's left?  Planting in our own back yards?  Elitist pigs!  How dare we elevate ourselves over tenement dwellers, us and our land-grabbing culture?

If we grow no food, at least we can watch a culture consume itself.


E Hines said...

What's this woke person to do?

I won't plant cauliflower anywhere--I hate cauliflower. Call me a hater.

If we plant yucca and plaintains--yuccas are ugly, and I got sick of them in Las Cruces. I don't plant plaintains because I have no clue what they are. I prolly wouldn't like them much.

I participate heavily in community gardens; I get and eat lots of meat. Gardens don't get any more community than pasture.

I support Big Ag because it's efficient, and I support capitalism because it's a Good. I don't hate everything.

I don't plant in my back yard because I hate grubbing in the dirt.

I don't need to elevate myself over tenement dwellers; I'm not embarrassed by their essential equality with my august self. I don't need to elevate myself over the woke; I was born elevated above them.

I guess I'm not woke. Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty I'm free at last.

Eric Hines

Texan99 said...

I don't know about yucca root, but plaintains are delicious, like a banana but a little harder and starchier and suitable for stews or fritters.

But I denounce myself for cultural appropriation. Presumably I'm still allowed to like cauliflower: mmm, gratin, and tots. Admittedly I like them best adorned with cheese, breadcrumbs, and/or eggs.

Assistant Village Idiot said...

Some people are addicted to complaining, it seems.

Gringo said...

Yuca is from South America.Plantains are from Asia. Sounds to me as if it is rather colonialist to grow those in the United States.

Gringo said...

If we plant yucca and plaintains--yuccas are ugly, and I got sick of them in Las Cruces.

AOC is not talking about yucca from the Southwestern United States, but about a root from South America: Cassava/yuca
Manihot esculenta, commonly called cassava (/kəˈsɑːvə/), manioc,[2] yuca, macaxeira, mandioca and aipim is a woody shrub native to South America of the spurge family, Euphorbiaceae. Although a perennial plant, cassava is extensively cultivated as an annual crop in tropical and subtropical regions for its edible starchy tuberous root, a major source of carbohydrates. Though it is often called yuca in Latin American Spanish and in the United States, it is not related to yucca, a shrub in the family Asparagaceae. Cassava is predominantly consumed in boiled form, but substantial quantities are used to extract cassava starch, called tapioca, which is used for food, animal feed and industrial purposes. The Brazilian farinha, and the related garri of Western Africa, is an edible coarse flour obtained by grating cassava roots, pressing moisture off the obtained grated pulp, and finally drying it (and roasting in the case of farinha).

AOC is being VERY Puerto-Rican centric. Yucca and plantains are grown in Puerto Rico. Potatoes are a root vegetable much better adapted for growing to the US- and also much higher in protein than yuca. Plantains cannot be grown in most of the US- and definitely not in the Bronx.

I doubt that AOC has ever heard of the YUCCA plant from the Southwestern US.

AOC reminds me of a Valley Girl.

Gringo said...

Correction: Yucca and plantains are grown in Puerto Rico.

To: Yuca and plantains are grown in Puerto Rico.

Yuca is rather tasteless, and VERY low in protein.

Texan99 said...

Potatoes are just a cultural appropriation of South American culture, or Irish, or maybe both. I think in appropriating Irish culture, which previously appropriated American, we double our guilt rather than negate, but I'll have to wait on a ruling.

E Hines said...

I'll have to wait on a ruling.

It'll be a long wait. Those who might rule would be culturally appropriating from every exogenous culture that ever had anything remotely analogous to a judgment facility, all the way back as far as Lucy, who charged her offspring with sassiness.

Gringo: Surely Power Line didn't misunderstand....

Although they are wrong about cauliflower, plastic cheese, and bacon bits. The only way that mess gets edible is by holding back the cauliflower and plastic, and substituting real bacon for the bacon bits, since anyone who uses bits in mixes like that are using textured vegetable protein instead of actual bacon.

Eric Hines

Gringo said...

E Hines: Gringo: Surely Power Line didn't misunderstand....

I assume you are joking.

douglas said...

You don't have to wait on a ruling- the rules are simple in their deliberately infinite complexity- You are not one of them, so you are wrong. Always and in everything. Simple.

ymarsakar said...

Humans are living rent free on this Earth.

It's about time somebody filed an eviction notice or late rent due notice, to the Divine Counsel.