"Climate Change Started Those Wildfires"

In a way, that turns out to be true. That madness inspired by being taught to believe in catastrophic climate change was in fact responsible. 
A former forestry student-turned-shaman and yoga teacher has been charged with starting a huge California wildfire that has destroyed 41 homes - and was being investigated in connection with other fires - after claiming the blaze was triggered accidentally while she tried to boil bear urine so she could drink it.  
Now if you think that sounds like a reasonable explanation, hang with us here folks.
During questioning by investigators, Souverneva... claimed that she had been thirsty whilst out hiking and found a puddle in a dry creek bed which contained bear urine. 

She then claims she attempted to filter the water using a tea bag but when that failed tried to start a fire to boil the water. Souverneva said that it was too wet to start a fire so she drank the water and continued walking. 
Boiling urine does not improve it, but she wasn't even actually able to boil it, so she drank it anyway
Souverneva is known to be a graduate of the California Institute of Technology and former Bay Area biotech employee. 

She has also worked as a yoga teacher and describes herself as a shaman - a person who claims to have a direct connection with the world's good and evil spirits. 
Now, just on the off-chance that any of you out there reading this should think that you're a shaman in contact with good and/or evil spirits, let us have a short safety briefing. 

1) Do not drink urine, boiled or otherwise.

2) Do not start forest fires. 

That is all.

3 comments:

  1. Anonymous5:29 PM

    She was also carrying green, leafy (herbal?) things, leading to some suspicion that she might have been under the influence of something-not-arugala. Or it could have been a sage bundle. The story didn't go into detail.

    She does sound as if she's an enchilada short of a combo plate.

    LittleRed1

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  2. She may be becoming a little too one with the universe.

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  3. Well, starting forest fires might well please the God of Fire. It's just too bad if it displeases other gods.

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