Obviously Correct

Kansas man proposes trial by combat to resolve divorce. In accord with ancient female privilege, he offers to permit his wife to send her lawyer as champion, so that of the two of them only his life would really be at stake.

Her lawyer might consider a new profession, but hey: I’m pretty sure the legal profession would be improved by having more skin in the game!

8 comments:

  1. He needs the right lawyer.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aRSC2vaP5Do

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  2. That’s an awesome ad.

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  3. Twelve weeks to source a sword seems very excessive to me. He clearly doesn't know the right people.

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  4. Maybe the wife should exercise her right to have him stand in a hole up to his waist for the duel.

    Or just bring a gun to his sword fight. She might go to jail for that for a bit, but he'd never bother her again.

    Eric Hines

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  5. If she does the hole thing, the form requires she trades her sword for a heavy object wrapped in a veil. But it’s nice to see the old forms obeyed.

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  6. Daniel, I was sure I'd find the Law Hawk at that link! I love his ads.

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  7. the form requires she trades her sword for a heavy object wrapped in a veil.

    Define your terms, Sir. Heavy means massy as well as weighty. Mass is a compound of a physical property and its energy state.

    Accordingly, I suggest a bullet fired through a scarf satisfies "heavy object wrapped in a veil." On the other hand, he'll likely be wearing a shirt; the heavy object will acquire its veil wrapper along the way.

    Eric Hines

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  8. Slings, with the lead balls wrapped in bits of her wedding veil, would serve poetically, too.

    Eric Hines

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